when standing is hard……
October 2023 Blog
The month of August was tough; the month of September was even harder. I lived in spirit and flesh exactly what my spiritual father prophet Lovy Elias explained; “when you pray and say Lord, remember me and give me strength”; it marks the season when you have given up trying on your own.
In August, when I faced the uncertainty, I felt it in my spirit earlier in the morning before I was aware; I cried in pain, and it hurt. In September, I felt my body and the impact before I crashed, weeks in advance. I did not understand what was happening, but as the children of God, we have insight and foresight.
I have always been that person who finds solutions for everything, my family knows and says, “Mom will know how to fix this” They would even refer people to me. However, what happens when the person they run to for help is not capable of helping? My physical strength was gone, my head was cloudy, and the blow was hard.
What kept me standing? God
What kept me going? God
Whom did I run to when nothing made sense? God
Worship was the only thing I was able to find comfort in, my family needed me standing, and I needed Jesus to keep me standing. My body hurt, and my head was foggy. My sisters in Christ's prayers encouraged me. Nothing made sense but I knew God was the author and creator of my faith. The worship song’s lyrics were exactly what I needed to say when I could not pray.
Little by little, strategies came, answers came, and I kept going, I kept working, I kept responding, I kept praying, I just kept going. I knew that I knew that my Father God would not fail me. I knew that even if my flesh failed me He never would. I knew then as I know now that there is a light inside of me that never stopped shining, a light that never stopped burning. The fire inside of me kept on burning reminding me: I am here, you are not alone, I hear you, I see you, I know, I get it.
My sisters in Christ would check on me at the right moment, at the perfect time to see how I was doing. Those were answers I needed to see because that is how our father was answering. They were being obedient to our Father in heaven, by just checking on me, God sees us and hears us.
Things are not where they need to be. It might take longer for what I want to come to pass, I know God has all the answers. The vision is clear, I see why some things needed to happen. I know that my plans are not His plans. I know His plans for me are to prosper me and never to hurt me. I hold on with all I can to what He has announced and promised me. My family belongs to Him; all that has to do with me will be worked out for my good. I give Him glory because He knows me better than I know myself.
2 Corinthians 4:8-10 NIV
8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.
Let’s pray - Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus I speak life into dead circumstances in our lives, we understand that these things had to happen for you to be glorified, so Lord glorify yourself. Lord, you have said vengeance is yours, let me laugh with you again and again Lord. Bring your joy into my life because you joy is my strength. I pray that anyone reading this finds encouragement and begins to see clear, let them have strategies, let receive fast answers as you have done for me do for them. In the mighty powerful name of Jesus I pray AMEN!